


Stay Up and Fight

by megyal



Category: Naruto
Genre: Arguing, Community: kakairu_fest, M/M, Pre-Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-21
Updated: 2015-01-21
Packaged: 2018-03-08 12:18:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,216
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3208871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/megyal/pseuds/megyal
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em>Since the very beginning of this ambling journey to a meeting with the Daimyo in the Land of Waves, they had been at each other's throats. </em>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	Stay Up and Fight

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Kita_the_Spaz](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kita_the_Spaz/gifts).



> Written as a gift for Kita_the_Spaz, for pinch-hitting! It's very small, Kita but I hope you like it. The prompt I used is in the end-notes. Thanks so much to N for reading this over for me and picking out any weird stuff.

_Well. That's not good_ , was Tsunade's first thought as the rumbles from the cave-in died down, the sharp stones stopped whizzing by far too closely and the dust in the air began to settle ever so slightly. Her aides groaned and coughed around her, but Tsunade had been protected by her lead bodyguard with a solidly made earth wall; she straightened up from where she had been crouched behind the thick shield and gazed around but in vain: it was all pitch-black here where they were trapped underground. At the same time, she felt an insistent push at her chakra, as if it was slowly wrapped up into a useless ball in the pit of her stomach.

 _No, not good at all_.

The second thought was more of a prayer than anything else: _Don't say anything, don't say anything. DON'T. SAY. ANYTHING._ However, because she wasn't particularly blessed with luck, her prayer went completely unanswered.

"Hatake-san?" A bright, friendly and _utterly grating_ voice piped up from somewhere to her left. Tsunade stifled a groan and closed her eyes even though her surroundings were in complete darkness. "Would you say that was all a part of your plan?"

Kakashi, who had protected the Hokage with his rapidly formed earth-wall, said in a toneless manner, "At least it was _an actual plan_ , Umino-san...instead of just standing around talking in circles with bandits."

"It wasn't just talking, Hatake-san. We can't go around attacking any group we encounter just as show of force. They were about to _leave us alone_... but apparently you're operating under the influence of a hair-trigger?" Iruka suggested with an icy calm that Tsunade found a bit baffling, to be quite frank. Iruka was one of the warmest, sweetest individuals that she knew; if she hadn't seen him in action, she would have been doubtful of his ability to carry out his duties as an academy sensei and as a field-shinobi. This reaction to Kakashi was nearly extreme.

On the other hand, the very fact that Kakashi was responding to Iruka's increasingly sharp jibes was a wonder unto itself. Usually Kakashi was the epitome of nonchalance. She had heard Gai describe him as _The Very Illustration of Indifference!_ Anko had grumbled that it was more a sort of self-imposed catalepsy than anything else. Since the very beginning of this ambling journey to a meeting with the Daimyo in the Land of Waves, they had been at each other's throats. Not literally, although it had been a close thing quite a few times. They had, of course, made a feeble attempt to keep their arguments away from the Hokage's hearing, but she had good ears.

When Tsunade had told Kakashi that Iruka would be taking Shizune's place as her primary aide for this trip, Kakashi had actually wrinkled his nose, the movement visible under his mask. His exposed eye had narrowed slightly and in voice even more bored than usual, had inquired, "Are you sure, Hokage-sama? Iruka-sensei can be...impassioned, to say the very least."

"He's extremely efficient," Tsunade had pointed out, raising her eyebrows and exchanging a questioning glance with Shizune. "Highly recommended. Knows quite a bit about bureaucracy and whatever legislature those old farts prefer these days."

"Most likely his penchant for micro-managing," Kakashi had mused, dismissively and ignored Shizune's incredulous little huff. 

A few hours after that meeting, Tsunade had called Iruka; he had been quietly pleased with his appointment as her aide, until she informed him that Kakashi would be taking the role of her lead bodyguard for this journey (or rather, the jounin had volunteered himself, and blandly stared down anyone else who had even thought to consider the post). The sensei's expressive face became like an Anbu mask, dark eyes flat and cold.

" _Hai_ , Hokage-sama. I will ensure that our show of strength is taken in a positive light," was all he had said, but his tone of voice implied that he would probably prefer to be tied up, covered with molasses and hung upside down over a very large nest of fire-ants, rather than work in any close proximity to Kakashi.

"They don't agree with each other, Tsunade-hime," Anko had shared a few nights ago when they'd been guzzling bottles of alcohol in a back-office of the Tower. Shizune had given up on them to go tuck Tonton into bed. "They argue all the time. It's almost like watching an actual battle, only with words."

"I wonder...is that helpful for general morale?" Tsunade wondered aloud, holding her seventh bottle very carefully in both hands and swaying from side to side very slightly. "Two of the most popular shinobi in the village, at loggerheads like that?"

" _Loggerheads_ ," Anko had repeated, rolling the word around in her mouth as if she didn't quite know what it meant. She then snickered into a very large mug which they had confiscated from the kitchens. "Well...actually, it's mostly just interesting. They rip each other to pieces, it's so funny!" She actually snorted a little with amusement. "Genma keeps a book on them. I think Iruka is ahead 54-50."

"Tongue well sharp on both sides, hmm?" Tsunade said as she poured a bit more alcohol into Anko's mug. 

Anko's head moved back and forth in an exaggerated nod. "People rarely mess with him after they see him toe to toe with the Copy-nin." She cackled some more, took a very large gulp and then adopted a considering expression which made her seem as if she was plotting a complicated heist. "And...it makes Kakashi look like a normal human being, you know?"

Tsunade considered the drops of condensation slipping indolently down the long neck of the bottle, and then asked the most important question: "What did you say were the current odds?"

Now, Kakashi and Iruka were at it again, and Tsunade settled back into a comfortable position in the dark, listening to them snipe at each other. It would have been kind of entertaining if they hadn't been verbally jabbing at each other for the past four days. 

They argued over _everything_ : where to create the shelters and tents every night; what _kind_ of shelters and tents to put up; which shinobi would be in charge of cooking the daily meals; _what_ the daily meals should be made of; how many watches should be set around the encampments (Kakashi usually won these) and what time they should stop travelling for the day (Iruka seemed to wear down Kakashi through sheer stubbornness on this particular point). 

The other three accompanying shinobi seemed transfixed by the rapid, tense exchanges. It wasn't as if they were making death-threats at each other, nor was there the slightest hint of a killing intent; but Tsunade was rapidly reaching her limit with these two idiots. She was going to do something drastic, and soon; she felt she wasn't the kind of Hokage to pull rank in a situation like this, but needs must.

"How do you suggest, Hatake-san," Iruka began in an infuriatingly reasonable tone, and Tsunade could feel every single one of Kakashi's hackles rise, "that we escape from this hole you've trapped us in?"

"Yokishi, Bachiko, Matsu," Kakashi ordered, apparently choosing not to engage Iruka right now. "Help us to move the rocks, quickly."

Tsunade took careful note of his taut but steady tone. To be caught in rockfall underground was listed as one of Kakashi's most negative experiences, but he seemed to be managing quite fine; Iruka's needling had probably distracted him in an effective manner.

Iruka asked, "Tsunade-hime, are you injured?"

"No," she hasted to assure. "I'm fine, I'll help."

Working together, they tried to move as much as they could, but there seemed to be an unending strata of rubble, a few stones too large for them to shift in their weakening state. Tsunade tried to summon some of her chakra reserves to punch her way through, but the energy refused to obey her commands. The rest of her team seemed to be breathing quite laboriously as well, and their movements slowed even though the most of the blockade remained unmoved.

"This entire layer of rocks has chakra-sapping minerals," Iruka pointed out as they stopped for a well-needed break. Tsunade's mouth felt dry, and she could hardly remain on her feet, so she sat very carefully on the ground once more. "I'm sure none of us can manage even a katon right now."

There was a surprising pause from Kakashi before he said, "...you can sense those?"

"Of course I can," Iruka snapped in a manner that Tsunade had never heard him direct at anyone else except for Kakashi. "If you hadn't been so busy attacking people who weren't yet confirmed to be criminals, you would have sensed it too."

"I am in charge of the general safety of this trip," Kakashi said in what sounded like a vicious hiss. Tsunade and the other three released simultaneous sighs into the darkness. "I'm really not interested in you being all friendly with every strange group we meet, Umino-san. We're ninja, not an outreach organization."

Iruka snorted; with an effort mostly powered by annoyance, Tsunade got to her feet, silently picking her way over to where their voices now emanated. They seemed to be standing close together at this point, probably breathing each other's air in sheer anger. Good; Tsunade wouldn't have to drag them to stand side-by-side in order to knock their skulls together.

"In charge." Iruka's voice dripped with scorn. "Not at all reassuring to me at this moment, I have to admit."

Kakashi made a sound as if he was being strangled. "Why, you--you just keep _talking_!"

"You can _try_ to shut me up the way you _always--_ "

Tsunade halted in mid-step, so surprised at the sudden quiet that she momentarily forgot about her wooziness. She could hear the others murmuring and shifting about as well, for Iruka's harsh speech had been cut off so abruptly that the silence now seemed extremely loud.

"Iruka?" she yelled and scowled as she heard a small intake of breath a small distance ahead. "What's happened? Did you fall into a pit with Kakashi or something?" _Please let that be true_ , she thought a bit uncharitably.

Kakashi made a very quiet sound, like a hum and Tsunade frowned even more. Maybe they _had_ fallen into a pit. Wonderful, now she'd have to patch them up even more. A worrying suspicion began to dawn in her mind.

"Did you stab each other or something?" she asked. "I forbid you to kill each other. Or at least avoid any major arteries."

"Uh, no, Hokage-sama," Iruka said and let out a breathless sound that was probably a laugh under normal circumstances. "Um. We're fine." Those last two words seemed like more of a question than a statement, and Tsunade crossed her arms over her chest, huffing in annoyance.

"Get us out of here, then," she commanded. "I hate not being able to use my chakra." The other shinobi muttered in agreement.

"I--" Kakashi started and cleared his throat. "Well. Yes. Sorry, Hokage-sama, we were just...figuring some things out. Let's see. Umino-san, can you...feel a path where the chakra-sapping mineral is in smaller quantities?"

"I think so, Hatake-san. There, to the right. No, no: _my_ right."

Tsunade tilted her head, listening closely to their voices. There was always some strained quality whenever they spoke to one another, and while they seemed just as tense as usual, there was a different atmosphere about them: a heavy, expectant sensation. 

"Hokage-sama, everyone," Kakashi said, just as Tsunade was about to ask again if they were both alright. "Please take cover."

After a long pause, a crackling sound tingled through the air. Branches of fine, flimsy-looking lightning lit through the darkness and slid groggily but persistently along the rocky surface, converging onto one small spot. The lightning piled up at that convergence and under the electrical weight, the rock crumbled and a spear of precious sunlight stabbed through the darkness. Tsunade released a shaky exhale as her chakra unfurled like a dormant flower and the fatigue began to seep away.

"Step aside!" she bellowed, clenching her fists and stalked to where Kakashi had made that small aperture. She pulled back her arm and then drove it forward with astonishing speed, striking that miniature target with the flat of her knuckles. The rubble blew outwards with a fantastic reverberation of sound, the day rushing into the cave to greet them. Kakashi was out first, his lean frame clambering over the pile of demolished rock. His head turned from one side to the other as he scanned their environs before beckoning to the rest of the team. As soon as Tsunade emerged, she ordered everyone to take a seat on the soft grass under the nearby trees so that she would take a closer look at any injuries. 

Kakashi and Iruka positioned themselves at either end of the line, and pointedly did not look at each other, nor said a single insulting word. Tsunade wasn't sure, but she could have sworn that a slight blush brushed both their cheeks.

 _Interesting_ , she thought as she cleaned the gouges and cuts, wrapping them in clean linen from her kit. _Maybe Genma needs a new book_.

**Author's Note:**

>  **Prompt:** _I'd really like something featuring Kakashi and Iruka on a mission with Tsunade; either as aides or to protect her during negotiations and the sexual tension between the two of them. Snarking at each other would be awesome. Sex is not required, but would be a bonus. I just want that wire-tight tension and the yummy struggle between them._
> 
> And the title is from this quote: _Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight. ~Phyllis Diller, Phyllis Diller's Housekeeping Hints, 1966_


End file.
